New pipeline will carry Alberta Craft Beer to tidewater 

After years of political wrangling over the expansion of Kinder Morgan’s Trans Mountain Pipeline, the Alberta government has announced the construction of a new pipeline that will carry craft brewed beer from Alberta to British Columbia.

“We’re working with entrepreneurs to create jobs and brewing in Alberta is thriving, with more breweries and distilleries opening their doors or growing their businesses,” said Premier Rachel Notley.

“I’m thrilled Kinder Morgan has agreed to help export our craft beer to foreign markets through this pipeline… all the way to tidewater,” a cheerful Notley exclaimed while raising a cold pint of Alley Kat Scona Gold.

The proposed pipeline, with 980 kilometres of pipe, would increase Alberta’s export capacity to 1,000,000 kegs per day. An investment of $10.8 billion would complete the connection between Edmonton and Burnaby.

“Our government is proud to support a successful and growing industry from grain to glass to tidewater as they broaden job opportunities, help diversify the economy and make great products,” exclaimed Joe Ceci, Minister of Finance and Craft Brewery Development, after taking a sip of East Calgary Lager from the Cold Garden Beverage Company.

“It is great to see that the craft brewing industry in Alberta is obviously flourishing. I’m also happy to see the number of jobs that will been created as a result of this new pipeline,” said Agriculture and Hops Minister Oneil Carlier while enjoying a glass of Naked Woodsman Pale Ale  from Bench Creek Brewing.

“We are proud to support Alberta’s successful and growing liquor manufacturing industry. This pipeline will provide manufacturers with an export capacity that makes sense, reduces licensing costs and creates job opportunities by enabling business growth,” said Ceci.

But the opposition remains unimpressed.

“Last week I wrote the Premier asking that her Government convene an emergency sitting of the Legislature to allow MLAs of all parties to discuss this critical economic issue, inform the government’s approach, and hopefully show a sign of unity in calling for federal action to get the Craft Beer pipeline built,” said Official Opposition leader Jason Kenney.

“The Craft Beer pipeline is critical for Alberta and it is the national interest for this project to succeed,” said Kenney.

In response to Kenney’s criticism, Notley simply stated, “I know, Jason. That’s what I’ve been working on for the past three years.”

Notley is expected to join BC Premier John Horgan for a ceremonial keg-stand near the Alberta-BC boundary next month.